Fit for Life: I am…(Fill in the Blank)
Saturday, April 08, 2023
When we start a sentence with these words, it is either a precursor to the identity we want to create or an excuse for not doing or being what or who we are supposed to be.
We create our identity when we say these things to ourselves on a regular basis, and then we usually take the appropriate action to confirm our words and live behind the stories we tell ourselves.
We are actually labeling ourselves by telling ourselves these stories to live by.
GET THE LATEST BREAKING NEWS HERE -- SIGN UP FOR GOLOCAL FREE DAILY EBLASTIt all boils down to the way we think and the actions we take.
Last week as I walked into a local Italian deli, a man and a woman approached the door at the same time as me, so I held the door for them and they walked in before me. We were both looking into the case and when the person behind the counter asked if she could help me, I turned to the guy and asked if he was all set. He kindly let me order first.
To get a visual, this guy weighed all of 300 lbs at about 5’8 tall. He had that red-faced, bloated look and breathed heavily just walking the length of the deli case. In other words, he looked like a ticking time bomb. So much so that I glanced behind the counter to see if they had a defibrillator, just in case he collapsed while I was there.
Don’t take this out of context. I am not trying to be mean, I seriously was concerned for this complete stranger that was nice enough to let me cut him in line. When a person looks like that, it’s not a matter of “if’ he will encounter a disastrous health issue, but a matter of when, and I wish I could help everyone in this situation, but I can’t.
Anyway, I thanked him and ordered a piece of grilled Salmon, a side of lentil & tomato salad, and a small side of green beans. He then looked at the woman he was with and said “That’s what we should be ordering instead of killing ourselves.” Then he looked at me, so I said, “There are still a few pieces of salmon left.”
“Oh no, look at me. Do I look like the type to eat healthy?” I just laughed and said, “It’s never too late,” then walked away while he ordered stuffed peppers, meatballs, frittata and numerous other decedent-looking vittles. He continued by saying to me “I bet you ate bran cereal for breakfast,” so I shrugged it off and said, “No, I don’t like bran, I had a protein shake,” then took my food to a table to eat.
I knew in my head that it will take a scare from the doctor or an intervention from his family for this guy to change. Ya see, he already created the identity that he is a fat, unhealthy guy, and that’s the way it is.
He isn’t ready to make a change, therefore, he will continue to eat the same way he ordered that afternoon.
I heard great analogy years back, and it goes like this: If things aren’t going your way, and if your life isn’t turning out the way you want it to go, it’s because someone has a pen and paper and is writing the story about your life, and how it’s supposed to go. If you don’t like the way the story ends, it’s your responsibility to take that pen away from them, and start writing your own story on how you want your life to go.
STOP making excuses and creating the wrong identity for yourself if you are not happy with where you are or how your life is turning out. The guy in the deli admitted he was slowly killing himself yet refused to make a change.
I used to be guilty of making these three excuses when my life wasn’t going the way I wanted it to go.
1. I am not good with technology
2. I am not educated
3. I am not a good businessman
All stories I told myself and all self-fabricated identities that were nothing more than excuses for not being as successful as I wanted to be.
So what did I do? I took the pen back and started writing a different story.
•I got good enough with technology to get the things I needed to get done. I still can’t create a Facebook ad, or write code, but I know enough to get by. Everything else I delegate to others, or pay a marketing person.
•I am still not formally educated, however, I seek out the best mentors to learn from and follow their structure and leadership to do things like write ad copy, and these weekly emails.
•As far as business goes, I used to run my business on emotion and the fact that if I was a good enough coach to get by. Now I track my numbers much more closely, and have a better handle on my metrics.
You can do the same. If you say to yourself that you are antisocial, it’s because you don’t want to be around people. Anti-social is not a condition; it’s a label you put on yourself. I guarantee that if you spend time with good people, you will find it within yourself to socialize and have a good time around others.
I am not an exercise person is another one I have heard a bunch of times when it’s just another label to put on yourself to justify not exercising. We work with tons of people at Providence Fit Body Boot Camp that never exercised before, yet after a few months, our members take the pen back, and are now writing a different story.
I am not a good dancer. This is a personal truth, however, I don’t care because I don’t really like to dance. I did take salsa lessons in Cuba, and I’m still a stumbling fool, however I know if I pursued it further and on a regular basis, I would be able to bust a move by now. (You can keep the pen on this one).
The point I am trying to make here is that we can become what we want to become as long as we create the right mindset, tell the right story, and take the appropriate action.
If you truly care about being fit and healthy, start taking the steps needed to accomplish this goal. If you want to start making more money, do the things that move the needle forward on a daily basis. If you want to be a better dancer, dance more.
Remember, you are a product of the story you write for yourself.
If you don’t like where this story is headed, take the pen back and start editing, and write a different story!!
Coach Matt
